Cruel Intentions Season 1 Review – Absolute trash

Season 1

Episode Guide

Episode 1 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 2 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 3 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 4 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 5 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 6 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 7 -| Review Score – 2/5
Episode 8 -| Review Score – 2/5

 

Cruel Intentions is everything wrong with Hollywood’s recent string of modern adaptations. It not only fails to adapt its source material correctly, it also struggles to get the basics right, like plot progression, character development and, more importantly, giving a decent conclusion to the plot explored across the 8 episodes. Buckle up, because we could be here for a while!

It has been 25 years since the iconic film Cruel Intentions hit the big screen, 35 years since the film adaptation of Dangerous Liaisons, which itself was an adaptation of the 1985 play sporting the same name. There was also a pilot episode created back in 2016 for a spin-off of the 1999 film franchise, but if you’ve read the synopsis it’s thankful that didn’t get greenlit! All of this, before even mentioning the sequels. Suffice to say, this is a story that’s been around for a long time.

I won’t go into the nitty gritty details of each adaptation and how it’s changed for this 2024 but, but I will bring up the 1999 film, because Amazon’s latest series borrows very heavily from that, distorting, twisting and repurposing iconic scenes and moments.

*1999 film recap*

To understand the changes and for those unaware, I’ll briefly recap the 1999 film so you can see the changes to the plotline, because they’re pretty important to understanding where Amazon have gone so badly wrong with this one.

The 1999 film centered on wealthy teenager Sebastian Valmont, bored with his easy conquests and a womanizer in need of a proper challenge. He eventually settles on Annette Hargrove—the daughter of his new school headmaster who’s vehemently against sex before falling in love.

Sebastian’s true purpose here though is to try and win over Kathryn, his intelligent and popular stepsister. She’s adored by the faculty, but she does coke on the sly and has a big vendetta against freshman Cecile Caldwell. Kathryn has a massive chip on her shoulder because her ex-boyfriend left her for the naïve and innocent Cecile.

So the bet is made. If Sebastian fails to win over Annette then Kathryn will win the rights to Sebastian’s car. If Sebastian wins however, he’ll get to finally have sex with her. As the film progresses, the two storylines become intertwined, as Sebastian seduces Cecile to appease his sister, Kathryn manipulates Cecile’s current budding romance with music tutor Ronald, and Sebastian grows real feelings for Annette.

Al of this drama eventually leads to Sebastian hit by a car after Kathryn manipulates Ronald into hurting him, and in his dying breath, Sebastian professes his true love to Annette and gives her enough ammunition to take down his step-sister. And then, to the pulsating rhythm of Verve’s Bittersweet Symphony, Sebastian’s journal (aptly titled ‘Cruel Intentions’) is unveiled to the whole school and Kathryn’s reputation is absolutely shattered.

*1999 film recap ends*

The plot to the movie worked really well to modernize the novel, although that original book ended with our antagonist given a much more gnarly ending (she contracts Smallpox which permanently scars her and leaves her blind in one eye. This, in turn, makes her lose her greatest asset – beauty).

So now we come to the 2024 adaptation and boy have there been some changes here. Manchester Prep is still intact but instead, the story is split into different sorority houses. Kathryn is now Caroline, and she’s head of the Delta Phi club. She rules with an iron fist, stays proud and won’t take any insubordinate behaviour. At one point she even stamps on a phone and cracks the screen to show her power.

Caroline is joined by her right-hand woman, Cece (Cecille) and she’s much more influential in this adaptation. Gone is the naïve innocence and instead, she’s given more urgency and power, looking over the faculty and talking in that annoying tone where she just rambles really fast without a pause.

Instead of the music tutor affair, she instead has a fling with Professor Chadwick, whom she becomes a TA to. This guy is ironically played by the same actor as Ronald in the 1999 film. Go figure! Their discussions usually revolve around fascism and leadership, playing out as background fodder to the main event.

Of course, the bread and butter of this one stems from the bet between the stepsiblings, and it’s here where we meet Lucien. A womanizer in every sense of the word, he records all of his exploits on camera, rather than in a journal, and women continue to fall over themselves to be with him. How does this impact Lucien’s college life? Where reputation spreads like wildfire and social media is everywhere? Well, it doesn’t until the plot conveniently calls for it late on, which the writers just expect you to ignore completely. 

Lucien’s big conquest comes from Caroline. In order to sleep with her for “up to an hour”, Lucien agrees to try and help her win over the affection of Annie Grover. She’s the Vice President of the United State’s daughter and incredibly naïve. She shows up at college as a doe-eyed 18 year old virgin, although she’s watched over by Secret Service who make sure she doesn’t get up to no good. Until she does toward the end of the show.

Caroline’s interest here stems from wanting to bring Annie into her sorority house to dispel current criticism and stigma around a hazing incident that’s went horribly wrong earlier in the year. With the negative attention growing, she believes everyone will turn a blind eye and see their reputation instantly skyrocket with Annie in attendance. However, Caroline isn’t exactly a bundle of joy in public. She’s rude, arrogant, bossy, cliquey and talks down to most of the students. This sets up a very different dynamic than the film adaptation, although we’re led to believe that people still really like her.

As the bet starts to take shape, more subplots come into the fold as well. We get a completely redundant subplot involving Blaise Powell, who finds himself caught in a will they/won’t they romance with fellow student Scott, who is himself involved in a power struggle for the leadership of their sorority house Alpha Gamma with Brian Blandsman. I genuinely can’t tell if that name is an inside joke because yes, Blandsman lives up to his name. He is a bland man.

There’s also a separate subplot involving a bunch of activists too, fronted by a woman called Beatrice whom Lucien sleeps with right at the start of episode 1. She leads a group forward who want to put an end to hazing, but she has her own reasons for wanting revenge on Caroline. This ultimately ends up as another redundant plotline, despite its implications in the finale.

All of these seemingly disparate threads are haphazardly stitched together and while there are some good moments, the execution overall is absolutely atrocious. The core concepts and themes from the film are completely missing and that really feels unforgiveable.

The main attraction of the 1999 film came from seeing Sebastian grow from a black hole of emotion to this rounded, warm guy who fell in love and found solace in Annette, only to find his whole worldview turned upside down thanks to his manipulative step-sister. It’s your typical villain-turned-hero plotline that works so well here, and has been replicated in plenty of other media too, with notable examples being Vegeta in Dragon Ball Z and Spike in Buffy.

Unfortunately, Lucien’s journey feels non-existent as we never really warm to Lucien as a character because his journey starts as a womanizer… and ends in the same way, showing very little growth to be honest. The same can be said for a lot of other characters here. In fact, with the exception of Blaise, there’s no conclusion for any of these storylines as writers Phoebe Fisher and Sara Goodman are clearly baiting for a second season to give these characters more to do.

If you’re not familiar with either of those two names, they’re the same pair that worked on the adaptation for I Know What You Did Last Summer. Phoebe’s writing credits also include a 2023 film called Down Low… and that’s it. Meanwhile, Sara Goodman has writing credits which include Preacher, Outsiders and Gossip Girl. It’s worth noting this because Goodman appears to be the one pulling the strings here as this show has Gossip Girl vibes al over it. 

The cast are largely unlikable, cliquey girls with a complete lack of charisma while the boys are stereotypical jocks, complete with high fives “bros” and “dudes”, along with a stereotypical view of gay relationships. And even the main cast just fail to exude any sort of chemistry to carry this one. There are perhaps one or two moments between Caroline and Lucien where you feel some sort of connection or spark, but it all feels like the showrunners are afraid to offend with raunchiness or seductive moments. The only exception comes from one scene where Lucien brushes his lips over Caroline’s cheek, which genuinely feels very Cruel Intentions-esque. 

It’s so frustrating because you can see there are foundational ideas here for a modern spin on the genre, and with more capable and talented individuals (and a changed venue), you can definitely see that come to fruition. This show, instead of adapting and paying homage to the source material, attempts to be another wannabe Gossip Girl and fails immediately. It’s nowhere near raunchy enough, there’s barely any seduction outside the aforementioned moment, and the sanitized sex scenes we do get here are either played for comedy (like when Cece seduces a guy and gives him a snowjob. Yes, this actually happens) or devoid of any sort of romance or emotion.

I’ve made this argument before around sex scenes in media but the 1999 film Cruel Intentions is oner of the best examples of how to use sex and intimacy within your narrative to drive a story or character forward. Seeing Annette and Sebastian first make love together in that film is such a tender, sweet moment that develops Sebastian so much as a character; Sebastian as a caring lover is a complete contrast to the quickies and emotionless flings preceding this. In the 2024 adaptation, there’s none of that.

While one could make the argument that tis is going in its own direction, the show has this incessant need to constantly remind us of the 1999 film with these little key jangling nostalgic nods. Remember the car? Remember the cross that holds cocaine inside? Remember Placebo’s kickass Every You, Every Me? Here’s a slowed down rendition!

The biggest example of this failure though stems from a trip to an old people’s home. In the 1999 film, we get an iconic moment where Annette makes Sebastian laugh and the pair have genuine chemistry as his walls start to crumble on the way back from spending time at the retirement home.

The 2024 version? The pair are stuck in a hallway, where Lucien admits he’s jealous of Annie’s relationship with Scott (oh yeah, I forgot to mention there’s a throwaway romance in here between these two as well). She likes his jealousy and the pair kiss. Until she mentions his family and Lucien leaves in a huff.

On top of all this, Cruel Intentions has some of the worst editing I’ve seen in a show this year. The dialogue is completely destroyed and the flow of conversation disrupted by this incessant need to constantly jump between different subplots midway through a conversation. This happens multiple times, with one example being Cece and Chadwick discussing leadership, only to then cut to Alpha Gamma mucking about, then back to our pair, then over at Delta Phi to see what they’re doing, and then back to Cece again. You never really get acquainted with characters or see their chemistry together because the editors feel like they can’t linger too much and lose attention from their audience.

Ultimately, Cruel Intentions is everything wrong with modern adaptations. It’s a checklist of sanitized plot beats, stitched together haphazardly in a way that can only very loosely be called entertainment. This is a poorly written, poorly developed and forgettable waste of time. If you’ve enjoyed any other adaptation of Dangerous Liaisons, stay well away from this abomination.

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